Pissed Off

It is not a chest infection. The cancer is somehow back with a vengeance, despite all the high-dose chemotherapy and 2 transplants. I am very mad. But even more so I am very, very sad.

As Dr. Cooper described it, the cancer that has decided to nest inside me is very "pissed off." He's only once in his 25 years seen it come back so aggressively and so quickly after such a high-dose regimen.

I do not understand what it wants from me.

I will write more when I can have the capacity to accept this as reality.